Have you ever given any thoughts on writing your own wedding vows? Some shy away from it because they believe that the job is too stressful and difficult, so they would rather stay away from the process altogether than attempt to write them. However what most people don’t know is that you do not have to be Shakespeare to write good vows. All you need is to be expressive through your words, talk about why you love your fiancé and the life long commitment that you are ready to make to your partner!
Although it can seem overwhelming, it is so worth it to have your own personal and intimate writings shared with your partner as well as your friends and family! Here are some tips and tricks to make the writing process much easier for you, as well as ideas to make the vows unique, humorous, and heartfelt!
Don’t Wait Until The Last Minute
Your vows are going to be heard by your priest, all of your friends and family, your partner, and any other guests that you have present at your wedding ceremony. The last thing you would want to do is to start them last minute. We advise that you start pretty early in the wedding planning process so that you have time to write, revise, or make any changes to the writing.
Decide The Tone
One of the first things that you should consider before writing your vows is the tone that you would like to set for it. Do you want it to be comical and get laughs throughout the speech? An emotional writing that might cause some tears to be shed? Or maybe it’s a mixture of both! There is no right or wrong way to do it, but this should definitely be a factor for you to consider before starting because it could completely change your writing process.
Include stories or memories
Every couple has had special moments that helped define their relationship. It could be when they first met, their first date, a trip they took together, or any moment that has brought meaning to them. Reminiscing on these events can definitely be a heartfelt moment for the couple whilst it is being read, and can give guests an insight into a meaningful part of their relationship.
Don’t Drag It On
Words of affirmation are important, but if they drag out for too long then the intention of them could get lost in length. Vows should only be a few minutes tops. It should be kept focused and to the point to make sure that you don’t get too off track. You want to make sure that your guests and partner are able to follow along easily and not lose interest in what you are saying.
Typically the most important part of the vows are the promises the couple makes to one another. The traditional “to have, hold, love, and cherish, in sickness and in health, until death do us part” may not be your style, but there are many different ways to express the lifelong promises that you are about to make to your partner.
“I promise to forgive quickly and love fully…”
“I promise to honor and respect you…”
“I promise to show my love for you through my actions…”
Express Your Love
Tell your partner how much they mean to you. Let them know everything that you love about them and use emotion to express how much you adore them. You can explain your love for the little things that they do and lead up to the point when they won your heart.
Read It Out loud
One way for you to make sure that your vows sound the way that you want them to is to read them outloud. Reading over something in your head is completely different from speaking it. While reading out loud you might decide that you don’t like the way something sounds in your writing, therefore it is much better to figure out what doesn’t sound right early on than when it is time for you to read them to your partner!
Talk About Your Goals
Think about the goals that you have for you and your partner’s future and accomplishments that you desire to reach together as a team. Don’t be afraid to bring up the family that you hope to have someday, or the places that you would like to one day travel.
Although these tips may have been helpful, it can still be hard to decide where to begin. Below are a few questions that you can use as a template to help get you started!
Where did you first meet?
What were your first impressions of your partner?
When did you realize that you love your partner?
How have they changed you for the better?
Where do you see you and your partner years from now?
How has your partner impacted your life?
What is your favorite thing about your partner?